Thursday, August 6, 2009

Obsessed with CCRM

I regularly get emails from women who are curious about our take on CCRM and whether or not they should consider using them. And everytime, I can tell you for certain, that I sing the praises of CCRM ... and not just because they knocked me up good and strong on the first shot. No, I recommend CCRM because of the research that they do, their cutting edge technology, their staff, and their professionalism. If I had to guess I would bet many fellow CCRM infertiles (those that were successful and those that heartbreakingly weren't) would agree with me. After working with three other previous clinics and RE's ... it was easy to see just how superior CCRM really is. One of my favorite things to relay is that I feel like my CCRM IVF nurse knew more than most of my previous doctors!

During this successful pregnancy, since many folks in real life have known about our struggles, reasonably, they ask if it was a treatment cycle that worked ... and I'm grateful to be able to tell them that we were fortunate enough to be able to cycle at the best clinic in the country.

There's one more reason CCRM has been on my mind lately ... I remember when we were going back and forth with Schoolie as to whether or not doing a fresh cycle or doing a PBB CGH frozen FET would be our best bet and he said "Sure, we can get you pregnant on a fresh cycle, but I'm pretty sure you'll just miscarry again" ... well, we prayed about it and felt like trying the fresh cycle was the way to go. When Schoolie said those words to me I thought 'man, I hope we can prove you wrong!'

On 3 days past transfer, when we got the call that 'today will be the transfer day' I asked many a question about embryo quality, but my questions went unanswered. I have to think that things weren't going as well as they'd like (hence the day 3 transfer) and so in an effort to keep me optimistic they didn't share the information. Looking back, I'm grateful for that too! You see, I waited to schedule this regroup with Schoolie until AFTER the making it out of the first trimester, until AFTER getting good genetic screening results, until AFTER the big 20 week ultrasound ... so that I could feel confident about this pregnancy and not get discouraged if he were to tell me that my embryo quality was crap ... I think that if he said that, it might make me insecure about the health of the baby growing inside of me. And so we've waited.

So now, here we sit, 5 days away from our regroup call with Dr. Schoolcraft and our opportunity to say 'told you so!' (not really ;-)). Actually, I am hoping to find out what happened with our other 8 embryos, what stage/quality they were at on our day of transfer and how they developed up to day 5 and/or day 6. I'm wondering what he thought of our egg quality and embryo quality. I'm wondering if he'd change our diagnosis after seeing us through an entire cycle. I'm wondering what he would suggest for us in a future cycle ... or would he recommend we not 'fix what ain't broken'. Really, the data is a 'nice to know' but my heart lies in finding out what happened to our little embryos that didn't make it ... even being in the middle of a successful pregnancy, my heart breaks for what we lost.

Two nights ago I guess I couldn't get Schoolie off the brain. I had a nightmare about our call. It just had to do with having him on the line and then my 45 minutes of unsuccessful attempts to conference call Berilac into the conversation. It was less about being unable to correctly dial my husband's number (for 45 minutes ... according to my phone display in my dream) and more about feeling stressed that the doctors are superior and I can't even dial a phone ... I think this concern stems from just wondering if they discarded our embryos because maybe they didn't meet their "standard" ... when I would have frozen everything. Although I know that only 25% of couples make anything to freeze on a given cycle, it was heartbreaking to land in the 75%. And I guess, if the dream tells anything, I feel out of control about that.

I'm hoping and praying that Tuesday's call will bring me some peace about how the cycle actually went down.

***

On another note, yesterday, for the first time ... I felt the baby kicking my bladder! One second I don't have to go pee, then the next, I was shocked that I did ... then the pressure went away ... it was AWESOME!

44 comments:

  1. I hope all goes well with your regroup call and I hope you find some answers.

    Just had to share this little bit with you - MTB and I met w our RE (obviously not Schoolcraft) to talk about our lonely frozen embryo and a possible next cycle. At one point, the RE suggested that our last cycle was not an overwhelming success - even though I was HOLDING MY DAUGHTER FROM THAT CYCLE ON MY LAP! Basically, his thoughts were that we had 16 eggs, 8 mature, 8 fertilized, transferred 3 on day 3, got pregnant w 1, and 1 made it to freeze, but we should have had more. My point in sharing this is just keep in mind that his idea of success is probably very different than yours. (By the way, I haven't told anyone yet that we met w the RE again - you are the first.)

    And how cool are the bladder kicks??

    {{hugs}}

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'll be interested in your regroup too. I think CCRM is a good place, and I'm so glad it worked for you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Good luck on Tuesday! That's so cool you felt the baby...yay!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Good luck on Tuesday! That's so cool you felt the baby...yay!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I totally agree with you on CCRM...and I did way back in the fall when I miscarried after our first cycle there. I think they are all that and more. I had a great experience and don't have a single complaint - except maybe the insurance thing:-) (can't sing their praises loud enough)

    In the meantime, Congrats on your beautiful pregnancy and feeling that bladder kick! I'm dying to feel movement down there but have a few more weeks. good luck on your phone call! (also, I laugh b/c while we are focused on this wonderful pregnancy, we are also curious about chances of cycling again in a little over a year to get a sibling, lol, no rest!)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Polly, I just wanted to throw out my opinion seeing as I am one of heartbreakingly unsuccessful ones from CCRM. (-;

    I see posts singing the praises of CCRM often and always cringe a bit because I think it is easier to see all that is good when sitting on the right side of statistics. Had a cycle worked at another clinic, they would be the recipient of those praises.

    They are a good clinic, but like everyone else they also have their flaws. I could probably write a book because it is easier for me to see their flaws falling on this side of statistics.

    I am thrilled to tears for everyone they have been able to help (including you!), but just wanted to throw this out there for another type of opinion.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Brenda (Lost In Space) ... thank you for your perspective ... you are right, I really can't speak for those that didn't work out ... so I'm grateful you've brought that to this post. Maybe you'll write up your summary on CCRM ...I would love to read that. Best to provide some balance on the topic for those who are interested, right?

    Thanks Bren,
    Polly

    ReplyDelete
  8. Curious to hear how it went. Fill us in when you can.

    ReplyDelete
  9. buy diazepam diazepam sedation dosage - does 10 mg diazepam look like

    ReplyDelete
  10. buy xanax online how xanax affects the brain - cheap xanax overnight

    ReplyDelete
  11. buy xanax xanax withdrawal chills - does generic xanax pills look like

    ReplyDelete
  12. diazepam 10 mg diazepam to buy online - buy diazepam online no prescription

    ReplyDelete
  13. buy xanax online xanax side effects overdose - buy alprazolam online cheap

    ReplyDelete
  14. diazepam online diferencias entre valium y diazepam - valium dosage for small dogs

    ReplyDelete
  15. zolpidem 10 mg zolpidem tartrate 20 mg tablet - zolpidem tartrate molecular weight

    ReplyDelete
  16. ativan pills ativan overdose side effects - ativan side effects rash

    ReplyDelete
  17. discount xanax xanax bars schedule - xanax side effects loss of appetite

    ReplyDelete
  18. buy valium valium vicodin - pictures of generic valium

    ReplyDelete
  19. zolpidem high ambien (zolpidem tartrate) is classified as a/an - zolpidem tartrate er versus ambien cr

    ReplyDelete
  20. ativan for sale buy lorazepam australia - ativan dosage vs xanax

    ReplyDelete
  21. diazepam 10mg pass diazepam drug test - drug interactions diazepam ibuprofen

    ReplyDelete
  22. cheap xanax online xanax rebound anxiety - xanax for anxiety after drinking

    ReplyDelete
  23. diazepam cheap diazepam 2mg overdose - diazepam side effects in children

    ReplyDelete
  24. buy ativan ativan addiction mayo - ativan 321 m

    ReplyDelete
  25. soma generic what is carisoprodol 350 mg for - soma drug back pain

    ReplyDelete
  26. carisoprodol 350 mg carisoprodol 350 mg - what is a soma considered as on a drug test

    ReplyDelete
  27. buy valium online valium side effects in kids - drug half life valium

    ReplyDelete
  28. buy valium online cheap buy valium mastercard online - 10mg valium compared xanax

    ReplyDelete
  29. ambien no prescription color ambien cr 12.5 mg - ambien cr trial

    ReplyDelete
  30. buy ambien ambien and vyvanse drug interactions - ambien 93 73

    ReplyDelete
  31. buy cheap soma soma 7 panel drug test - somanabolic muscle maximizer review

    ReplyDelete
  32. buy valium online valium 5mg tablets diazepam - safe place buy valium online

    ReplyDelete
  33. ambien no rx ambien cr generic online - ambien sleep drug

    ReplyDelete
  34. carisoprodol 350 mg soma intimates discount coupons - carisoprodol name brand

    ReplyDelete
  35. buy ambien online overnight ambien walrus generator - buy cheap ambien no prescription

    ReplyDelete
  36. no prescription:valium valium 5 mg bula - green valium pill generic

    ReplyDelete
  37. Hi, MoxoredapeTox furosemide online no prescription - furosemide cost http://www.jacksbackyarddallas.com/#furosemide-cost

    ReplyDelete
  38. Dog Ear Medicine Drying Agent buy rimonabant online - acomplia 20mg pills http://www.buydiscountedisotretinoin.net/#acomplia-20mg-pills

    ReplyDelete
  39. advitleva propecia sale - buy generic propecia http://www.bestpricefinasteride.com/

    ReplyDelete
  40. Friends, prozac online pharmacy - order fluoxetine http://www.prozaccheaponline.net/#order-fluoxetine , [url=http://www.prozaccheaponline.net/#buy-fluoxetine-no-prescription ]buy fluoxetine no prescription [/url]

    ReplyDelete
  41. 2, buy generic finasteride - order finasteride http://www.propeciagenericforsale.com/#propecia-price , [url=http://www.propeciagenericforsale.com/#cheap-propecia ]buy cheap finasteride [/url]

    ReplyDelete
  42. tby order lasix without prescription - generic for lasix http://www.lasixforsaleonline.net/#generic-for-lasix , [url=http://www.lasixforsaleonline.net/#purchase-lasix-no-prescription ]purchase lasix no prescription [/url]

    ReplyDelete
  43. 4, provigil online pharmacy - modalert online http://www.energyofprovigil.net/#provigil-for-sale, [url=http://www.energyofprovigil.net/#cheap-modafinil]generic modafinil[/url]

    ReplyDelete
  44. Үour cuгrent write-up fеatures estаblished helpful to me.
    Іt’ѕ rеally informatiνe and yοu
    аre nаtuгаllу really eԁucаted in thіs
    areа. You have poppеd ouг еye іn ordeг to numerοus νiewѕ on thіs partiсulaг mattеr togethеr with intriquing, nοtable and strong
    written contеnt.
    Here is my webpage ... buy Soma

    ReplyDelete