I have not POAS today, but I did test out my trigger. I just wanted to make sure the trigger was gone ... to allow the option of testing early, but testing out trigger was so traumatizing that I've decided I'm just going to wait until beta. I will not POAS until just before beta - to prepare myself for the news of the dreaded call.
Days are dragging on.
Work seems unbearable.
Distractions are hard to find.
Emotionally, I'm a wreck.
Pray for me if you think of it - I'm really struggling with feeling loved by God. All I can do is cry out and cling to some good old scripture ...
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. (2 Corinthians 4:8-10)
How do you maintain hope while trying to prepare yourself emotionally for the worst? I want to stay hopeful, but at the same time, I don't want to be winded by the blow to the gut should the results come back negative - how does one keep this in balance?
Please continue to hold my hand while I wait ...