What's the haps?

Sorry it's been awhile ... the holidays - they seem to take over. Which, in the middle of going through another fertility cycle, is just fine with me!

Berilac and I travelled to Arizona to visit Berilac's family this Christmas and it's been great (I'm writing this from my inlaws sofa!). We almost missed the opportunity to come here due to the scheduling of my fertility cycle but being the smart man that he is - Berilac suggested we do a little "remote" monitoring on this cycle. So I'm going to an Arizona clinic every other day for ultrasounds and I take a shot each night ... just waiting for this cycle to do it's thing. Get this - we're having to pay $290 per ultrasound appointment here! (I've had 3 and I'm scheduled for one more!) Nobody said this was going to be cheap.

A little summary on my cycle: It started out so well with four follies taking the lead - we were so excited that we were within our goal of less than 5! (remembering that last cycle we had to cancel b/c I produced too many!) so b/c of my great showing early on in the cycle my dr panicked a bit and dropped my dose to the lowest level possible ... that caused me to stall out a bit, so she upped it a tad ... then I produced a total of 9 small follies and we flashed back to last month (ahhh!) so she didn't want to up my dose so we encountered more stalling, days of stalling! Then I had one lead follice jump ahead but then it stalled too. Now I am on my last two days of stims (CD's 18&19 - if you can believe it!) and if my ultrasound tomorrow doesn't show a good leading follicle or few ... we're going to cancel the cycle.

I tell ya, I can't win for losing. (whatever that means exactly) ... Supposedly I sit here with the problem of early menopause and when the attempt to stimulate me with ovulation drugs they find that I overstimmulate rather than under stimulate (which understimming what you would think would happen to me!)

This is so frustrating.

We are on CD19, we take 75iu of Follistim this evening and we have an ultrasound appointment tomorrow morning to see how the little guy (the lone follie) has developed. If it doesn't make any progress then we cancel the cycle, but if it does then we're in the race this month and we'll see if we're pregnant ... in two weeks.

Berilac and I have decided that this whole plain injectible stimulation isn't working for us. It's very difficult to dial me in - we're either completely failing by stalling out or over stimmulating and risking tons of babies. So our next medicated cycle will be IVF. I can't even believe that this is where we're at. Typically, I'm a very healthy person, I never thought we'd be here.